Trouble-shooting: Feedback / Suggestions Case 2

The group should not be deciding or choosing who gets their way but should be trying to figure out how to get the group's way. Frances seems to be looking at things from a "me-versus-you" perspective and has a really strong desire to be in control. Perhaps she has experienced a time when a group or partner failed to do its part, and she paid for it with a low grade or hurt feelings.

Effective groups have an atmosphere of partnership. The group must be clear about seeing its work as a process where everyone needs each other (remember positive interdependence?). Frances' strong need to be in control can be weakened by focusing on shared power to meet collective needs. The group should avoid power that is negative (i.e. "power over") and instead seek positive aspects of power ("power with").

Ask Frances to describe what she thinks are the needs of the group or what the situation really is. Keep her focused on the needs of the situation, not on controlling the situation. Help her come up with things that she can accomplish based on those needs. During the discussion, try to establish a strong sense of partnership with Frances. The idea is not to break down, but to build up and agree on what will help the group make progress on the assignments.

For example, make a list of things that need to be done to accomplish a group assignment. Set aside items that people disagree on, and make a list containing similar and viable options. Write these down and discuss them once the list is complete. Put similar items together and narrow down the list. Think about how each item would play out for the group.

The idea is to focus on key items or options that meet the shared needs of the group and have the best chance of being successful. By doing this, it weakens and defuses Frances' personal needs and focuses the group on developing agreements and seeking out shared goals.

The group could also assign Frances the "Praiser" role for a while. This assignment would complement the idea of having her work in partnership with what is of mutual benefit for the group as a whole.

Finally, if the group is not able to succeed on its own with Frances, a coach or facilitator may be able to accomplish what the group can't. The faculty member with whom the group is working could help with the coaching duties. Or the faculty member could recommend someone else on campus with experience and expertise as a coach who would be helpful with changing the group dynamics.

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